I’m calling for an end to fat shaming. Not fat shaming others, because it’s obvious if you do that you’re a jerk so that goes without saying… but fat shaming yourself. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve sat down for a meal and heard someone say something about how fat they are, how much they need to lose weight, and how they shouldn’t be eating this but it looks so good. Then the conversation turns to me: “You don’t have to worry about that.” “You’re so skinny you can eat everything!” “I wish I looked like you.”

I’m all for eating healthy, I’m all for taking care of your body, but I’m also a big advocate for appreciating what you have and for being happy with who you are. So first, I like to look at the positives of being skinny and petite. If you know me, you know that I have lots of pretty dresses and clothes and my closet is overflowing. I am glad that I can fit into a size 2 and never have to worry about my pants not buttoning or my dress being too tight. I appreciate that… but being skinny isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.

So here are the positives of not being “naturally” skinny: you don’t have to deal with what myself and other CFers do.

Ever since I was diagnosed, it has been a constant struggle to put on weight. I’ll never forget the time my doctor told me if I didn’t put on weight, I would need a feeding tube. As a kid, that scared me. So I had to drink disgusting chalky shakes, and choke down my meals even when I had no appetite. Not to mention, I always had to remember to take my digestive enzymes so that I wouldn’t get sick and so that all this food I was eating would absorb into my body. This is something I still have to do.

The fact is: the bigger you are, the better your lungs are able to handle infection. Each day, the fight to put on weight is literally affecting my health. There have been days in my life where I was sick, weak, and too skinny. Not having an appetite actually sucks…a lot! I hate the days when I feel too sick to eat, when I feel like I’m going to hurl with each bite.

And then there is the constant reminder from others that you’re small, and no matter how much you eat, you won’t gain weight. To most, this is a blessing and is something every one dreams of. But when I think about that, I think about how frustrating it is that if I was just able to put on weight from all the food I eat, I might be a little stronger and a little healthier.

So let’s just appreciate our size. If you want to be healthy, sure, eat healthy, exercise, yay health! But please, for the sake of everyone, don’t complain about how big you are, or how much you need to lose weight. Just be happy with who you are, and for the delicious food in front of you. And as much as you hate the skinny bitches of the world, know that we all have a story.

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